Labor’s Election Win: Why They Really Won
Well, blow me down with a leaf blower. Labor won the election. Honestly, I thought they would from day one of the campaign.
The Liberals didn’t lose because Australians suddenly adored Labor. They lost because they spent the campaign running around like headless chickens in a wind tunnel, clutching policies nobody liked or understood, and offering all the charisma of a damp sock.
This wasn’t so much a Labor victory as it was a Liberal implosion. And now, we have a Labor government walking around like they just cured cancer and discovered a new planet. But let’s be honest: we didn’t vote them in because we love them. We voted because the alternative was about as inspiring as a grey Tuesday afternoon in London.
So, now that Labor is in power with a majority big enough to crush small nations, let’s take a look at their policies. Spoiler alert: it’s a lot. And it’s going to cost with the bill eventually landing in your lap.
Health Policies Under Labor
First off: bulk billing. Labor thinks that if they throw a few extra dollars at GPs, they’ll suddenly stop charging out-of-pocket fees. Cute. That’s like thinking if you feed a crocodile some chicken, it won’t come back for your leg. It will.
Doctors have had a taste of private fees, and they like it. No one’s going back to bulk-billed Medicare.
Other health initiatives include:
- 24-hour 1800MEDICARE line (but who’s answering? Santa’s elves?)
- More urgent care clinics
- More women’s health support and PBS medications
- Lower PBS cap for prescriptions (good news if you pop pills like Skittles)
- 100 new mental health clinics (and if you’ve been watching politics, that makes sense)
Some of these are sensible, but remember they all come with a hefty price tag.
Housing & Real Estate
Ah yes, the housing market.
Labor has introduced a 5% deposit scheme now available to everyone. Even people who couldn’t finance a bicycle. The catch? You can access it from 2026, but the houses won’t exist until late 2027.
Result? More buyers, no houses. And that means house prices will skyrocket from stupid to intergalactic.
Labor also promises 1.2 million new homes in 10 years. Sounds impressive, but experts say they’ll miss the target by at least 450,000. That’s like aiming for Mars and ending up in Cambodia.
Energy & Power Bills
Labor is giving everyone $150 off their power bill. Nice if you’re reading a yacht catalogue under a lamp, but for struggling families it’s a drop in the ocean. Like giving a drowning man a cup of tea.
Meanwhile, their push for renewables and emissions reduction means higher short-term costs for businesses already battling rising energy prices.
Taxes & Deductions
From 2026/27, every Australian will get an automatic $1,000 deduction for work expenses.
Sounds generous until you realise even my son, who earns from a family trust while scrolling Instagram, qualifies. What’s he deducting? Hair gel?
A more logical solution would be to fix the tax code entirely. But this is a government, where logic rarely applies.
Education & HECS Debt
Labor has trimmed HECS repayments:
- You won’t pay anything back until you earn $67,000
- 20% of debts will be written off
- TAFE is free permanently
But here’s the catch: free stuff often gets treated like free stuff. Since TAFE went free, 600,000 enrolled but only 100,000 finished. The rest? Vanished. Probably off to start a podcast or OnlyFans account.
Childcare Subsidies
Green Policies & Transport
Enter the National Vehicle Emissions Scheme. Translation: if you drive a ute, the Government hates you.
Car makers will be penalised for selling petrol vehicles, nudging everyone toward expensive electric cars (which I call white goods) that cost the same as a small apartment.
Europe tried this, it’s a mess. Expect something similar here.Who’s Paying for All This?
Here’s the clever question my youngest asked me: Dad, who’s paying for all of this?
Answer: He is. You are. We all are.
Australia is spending more than it earns. That may work for the U.S., where the dollar is a religion, but we’re not America. We’re Australia farmers, winemakers, and reality-TV lovers. There’s a limit.
At some point, someone will say, Sorry, the party’s over. And our children, the ones cheering for free university, cheap electricity, and cheap medicine will realise they’ve inherited a national debt bigger than Clive Palmer’s ego.Final Thoughts: What Labor Means for Your Wealth
Some Labor policies are ambitious. A few may even work. But most will cost more than expected. The real issue isn’t the giveaways, it’s the growing debt and who will eventually repay it.
Governments don’t create wealth. They spend it. And sooner or later, they’ll come knocking with the bill.
So instead of relying on government promises, ask yourself: what are you doing to protect and grow your wealth?
Frequently Asked Questions
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